this is my story.

Is the Blog hype dead, or did everyone just move over to tumblr?

Oh well, if there's one who tries to resist change that would be me. I actually take that back, I forgot that I played FarmVille :) Point is, the past few months specifically the summer has made Blogger one hell of a busy place, hyped garbage here, meaningful pieces there. All I know is now, I seem to be the only one who's true to Blogger, haha, it deserves to be referred to as a person, in my experience, sometimes I feel like the only one who understands is my blog.

Blogger doesn't seem to be the only thing I can't detach myself from. It's been a year sometime this October since I started working at Orange Julius (N). A year of up and downs with my bipolar manager, female coworkers, and all the other nuts and crannies in between. Over the past year, I've learned a few things at Orange Julius that I believe are somewhat crucial to life itself;

1. Men are more likely to tip (Either this is fact or yeah...let's not go there).
2. If you flirt with a girl, you could convince her to buy a more expensive drink. eg. Three Berry Blast over Tripleberry
3. Mothers spend way too much money at Orange Julius, when they think we use the word "healthy" with entire honesty, that's if you find 600 calories in a drink "healthy".
4. Chivalry is not dead. In the "who pays for the Orange Julius" game, the boyfriend or guy in general always wins. This is actually a bit biased cause for example, if a boyfriend and girlfriend both tried to hand me a $10 bill, I always took the guys money :)
5. "I love a man in his uniform", that saying is entirely true, no doubt about it.
6. Women are all easily flattered by the same compliment you've been using for the past 6 hours of your shift.
7. Working with only women is more beneficial than you think, you learn a lot about your own mistakes when they talk about all the things guys do "wrong".
8.It pisses me off when people expect me to "hook them up", 99% of the time I will, really, it's just kinda annoying when people expect you to do it.
9. I find myself explaining this about 10,000x whenever I'm working, we don't fucking take the stupid SPC card.
10. Asking someone "How are you today" might just make their day.

Point is, it wasn't a bad experience but I feel a great urge to move on with my career and paper trail. The idea in my head; since I've done food, either move up to service or retail, "money is the motive, fuck with the money, and it gets ugly like cayote". Anyway, I see all these people upgrading, I wish I did the same in highschool, but Orange Julius was too fun. I swear though, I could do that shit with my eyes closed now D: We'll see, on top of school and everything, it'll be a chore finding a new job and getting the hang of it.

This upcoming week, 3 midterms, I ask you to put me in your prayers, but I will make sure that I go into every single one of those tests prepared. Not really worried about Psychology, and I feel like I have enough material to study for Sociology, it's just Religion, imagine have 3 questions define about 30% or so of your mark? Doesn't seem too fair don't it?

Nowadays, nothing seem to be fair. It's a sad thought that all the fairy tales we grew up with seem more of a blur each day. There is no happy ending, no "happily ever after", the Prince will leave you for another Princess, the princess will say no and decide to stay with the fire-breathing dragon you're trying to save her from. Am I too love-guru-ish, and both extremely optimistic or pessimistic about love and relationships, or maybe I just watch too much OTH? Since that 1st time I saw Nathan almost run Lucas over in Episode 1, Season 1, I knew I was walking into a very big mistake. After the 1st episode, whether you like it or not, you're gonna watch what comes after. After 4 months (Ironic numeber in correlation to the start of my TV-sitcom habit), I'm 6 seasons in, Brooke is a mess, Peyton and Lucas are getting married, Dan is held captive by Carrie, Nathan got recruited to coach a D-league basketball team, Mouth moved to Omaha, and Haley is about to walk into Carrie's trap. NO HOMO, that's all I can say really, but a lot of guys out there can say the same for themselves. 1 thing about the show however, disregard the obvious racism, infinite amount of money, the seemingly very static and boring town of Tree Hill, and the perfect little lives the characters live, everyone one of us can relate to someone or something in the show, story of our lives I might say. I give props to Mark Schwan for creating such a dreamy yet realistic plot, although season 5 and 6 have been quite shitty, and after season 6, I'll have to tune in to the television, and will no longer have the privilege of OTH marathons that are commercial-free, it's been a good run.

The rain pours, but we know the sunshine will come around. We fail miserable, but we don't give up on our dreams. They say "there's lots of fish in the sea", but what if the one you wanted got away, or just don't want you back, and you can NEVER be with them. Jad "BJ Penn" Carumeng once told me, "It's over, but I'm not over it." Hardest thing to get by this week, it almost seemed ridiculous that I even poured my heart out onto something that neither of us no longer believed in, oh wait, you never believed it in the 1st place. "Move on", it's a lot easier said than done, that's evident cause it's been a week since I've lost all hope and I still manage to talk about it now. I really got nothing to say to you at the moment, I'm neither angry or happy with this point we've come to, it wouldn't be fair to be angry and I have no excuse to, but really, what's there to smile about? If what you said was true, then I admire your honesty, that was something anyone deserves to hear if they're in our situation, a dying relationship or one that's failed to never start. Closure comes easy but mending it back together takes time, the more you break something, the harder it is to piece back together next time. I just wish we could work something out someway, somehow. I don't wanna let you go just yet, you've been good to me, and I'm definitely not ready, though I wouln;t be able to fight it if you decide to wlak out. But, I just can't decide what I want us to be right now, and it's clear that you feel the same way to a certain extent, and I hope that's okay. I wish we talked more often like we used to, I wish a lot things were how it was before.

"...I try to say goodbye and I choke,
I try to walk away and I stumble..."

- Macy Gray